Embracing Not Changing: You

Embracing Not Changing is a four-part series, which focuses on embracing yourself, your family, your significant others and your friends for who they are.

love yourself - self esteem concept - isolated text in vintage l

We are our own worst critic. We demand and expect too much from ourselves and it burns us out, leaving us depressed, anxious, unmotivated and unhappy.

Before you can embrace others, you need to be able to accept and embrace yourself, for who you are and for all the strengths you have.

Of course there are areas in which you can improve on and better yourself in, but there is a whole lot of them that you can’t change, no matter how hard you try.

All of us are unique, and yeah it sounds cliche but the truth is that though we may look the same on the outside, each of us has our own stories that sets us apart.

There are many articles out there about how to embrace yourself, but not enough about what to expect or what it entails, which may leave you confused or even curious.

#1. You’ll still feel insecure, but it’ll be minimal.

Unfortunately, your insecurities will never go away completely. There will be times when you’ll see a flaw and then feel insecure about it.

But learning to embrace, love and accept yourself for who you are, will keep those insecurities in the background, as minimal as possible.

Because your insecurities are mostly feelings, you can learn to take control of them, instead of letting it control you, and it is absolutely possible.

#2. It can bring you freedom in every way.

Has fixating on your imperfections give you a sense of any kind of freedom? Not me, for sure.

Every time I fixated on who I’m not and the flaws I have, it’s extremely tiring. I get sick of being nit picky and negative about them.

For me, that’s enough motivation to stop assuming the worst about myself and to start living a life of positivity. Once I was able to do that, it was liberating in every way possible.

When you realize and accept the fact that you aren’t perfect and that it’s part of human nature, it may lift a huge burden off of your shoulders.

#3. You’ll be able to avoid settling for less.

A lot of us tend to blame the end of a relationship on our ex-S.O.’s or our lack of promotion at our companies, and though, yes, it’s their wrongdoing, it’s also ours too.

You’re going to make decisions on who you date, who you marry, what kind of career you have, and etc, based on what you think you deserve.

You are responsible for the choices you make, and the results can be a breakup, a marriage, a promotion or a demotion, amongst many others.

Knowing your genuine worth, wherever that personally stems from, will help you to make wise decisions and prevent you from settling for less.

#4. You need to distinguish what you can and cannot change first.

Most of the time, we can’t pinpoint what it is that we can change and areas that we have no control over, before we start the process.

And that’s the problem. You need to figure out what areas of your life you can change and improve in, and which ones that you have no control over.

Many of the things you will most likely not be able to change is: employment, personality quirks and physical appearance.

Though those are the ones I mentioned, there is certainly a longer list, depending on the person who is making it.

#5. Get an accountability partner.

There are going to be days when you’ll need encouragement or get called out for certain things, and having an accountability partner is perfect for that.

Even though I have a close group of friends from church that are my accountability partners, my boyfriend is my main one because we interact on a daily basis and we’re not hesitant to be honest with each other if either of us step out of line.

Having an accountability partner can help you during this process and it will be more edifying to have someone you trust to guide you through it.

Heck, you and your accountability partner can help each other, walking side-by-side through this entire journey. Not only will you have a new friend for life, but it’ll help keep yourself in check.

#6. Trust the process.

It takes time to be able for this to come naturally to you. Respect and trust the process, don’t rush it. Instead, use it wisely and be thankful for everything you’re doing and learning to get there.

The journey is what makes you appreciate the destination even more. Once you get to that point, you’ll look back on all the struggles and successes you had and smile.

Out of everything, the tears, the joy and the lessons you learned about yourself and about your worth will be what you remember the most.

Featured Image: Bigstock

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