Combating Your Trust Issues

Trust takes time to develop, but it can crumble with one wrong move. Trust issues are a dilemma that everyone faces. However, the degree to which people experience it varies greatly.

Trust issues develop over time from persistent moments of betrayal. For instance, one who has been cheated on by several partners is more likely to have their guard up with new partners.

A person who’s been back-stabbed by multiple friends may feel hesitant in putting their trust in people right away.

Overcoming trust issues isn’t an easy process when you think about those who have wronged you in the past.

Nonetheless, mistrusting people all the time may seem like the right method to prevent yourself from getting hurt, but in the long run, you’ll only be hurting yourself.

A significant factor in maintaining all relationships is having a stable sense of trust. Here are some things to consider so you can successfully overcome your trust issues.

1. Find the root of your distrust.

Anyone who faces a severe lack of trust has their past experiences to blame. Before you begin tackling your trust issues, you should think about what exactly is the reason behind its existence if you’re not entirely sure.

Once you can identify the cause of your doubt, figuring out how to change your perception of people you hesitate to trust will come easier.

2. What is your level of expectation?

Disappointment tends to lead to mistrust. The higher your expectations are of others, the more likely you will be let down.

If you’re an extremely giving person, then you might feel taken advantage of when your friends don’t return the favor quite as often.

You have to remember that if you choose to be genuine, do it without expecting some form of reciprocation. Otherwise, you will begin to build resentment towards those around you.

3. Shift your outlook of others from negative to positive.

Even if a hundred people are disloyal toward you, don’t assume the next person is going to be as well. In other words, don’t generalize everyone you meet into the untrustworthy category.

People get hurt all the time, but don’t let the bad eggs from your past stop you from meeting potentially great people in the future.

Additionally, be confident and maintain a sense of security with those who haven’t been unfaithful.

4. Cut ties with people you know you can never put your trust in again.

When you decide to forgive someone after betraying your trust, then stick with your acceptance and move on.

You don’t necessarily have to “forgive and forget,” but keep in mind that although this person has wronged you, it’s ultimately your choice to forgive them and move on from their mistake.

It’s not healthy for you or them if you accept their apology, but remind them of their error. If you choose to keep them close, don’t allow your trust issues to prevent you from moving forward.

If you’ll never be able to look past how they deceived you, then it is best to cut ties with this person altogether.

Image: iStock

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