The people who raise you have one of the greatest impacts on your character.
Whether you turned out the way your family expected or far from it, you can’t deny they helped shape you into the person you are or aren’t.
Straying from the path your parents raised you on can potentially take a toll on them and thus, negatively impact your relationship.
Of course, many parents accept how their children turn out, regardless of how they choose to live their life.
However, for those who are conflicted between living your life the way you want, or the way your parents want, here are some things to consider.
1. It’s okay to disappoint your parents.
Everyone dissatisfies their guardians sometimes. It’s not only inevitable, but it’s a huge part of growing up.
Your parents have to understand you’re not going to remain the “perfect little angel” you once may have been—just like the rambunctious little kid doesn’t necessarily grow up to be so problematic.
Even the most responsible children will naturally disappoint their parents from time to time. You can’t please everyone, including your parents, all the time.
2. Independence equals living your life how you want.
Everyone desires independence as they grow older, but some would rather appease their guardians to the point they lose their autonomy.
Don’t allow your parents to control every realm of your life. Your lifestyle is completely up to you.
Never let the fear of displeasing your parents take away from your freedom. You have the freedom to make your own choices.
3. Avoid tying your well-being to your parents’ approval.
Requiring their consent all the time isn’t natural and shows a lack of confidence in your own decision-making.
If you’re always seeking your guardians’ validation, you will never be completely happy.
Date who you want to date, choose who you want to surround yourself with, and decide how you want to live your life when you’ve reached adulthood.
You can’t always control your parents’ happiness, but you’re always in control of yours.
4. You can maintain a healthy relationship despite your differing beliefs.
Unfortunately, not everyone is so lucky to have a positive relationship with their parents when both parties have conflicting views.
Regardless, you shouldn’t assume that your relationship isn’t strong enough to handle some disagreements.
I’ve witnessed countless of parent-child relationships where both sides constantly butted heads. Yet, they still loved each other at the end of the day.
Like a romantic relationship, your relationship with your family requires two things: compromise and respect.
5. Embrace your individuality.
One of the most important life lessons is to “be yourself.”
In other words, be the person you want to be, not the person others want you to be. This message tends to lose its meaning for some when they’re around their family.
While many parents allow their children to express themselves and support their decisions, stricter ones tend to have more influence in shaping their kids’ character.
With that said, it’s more difficult for some children to stray from the way their parents raised them. Your parents will love you no matter who you decide to be when you’re of age.
Sometimes it may take weeks, months, or even years for them to fully accept you, but you must believe that one day, they will accept you if they don’t already.
For the meantime, accept yourself for who you are.